By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to allow my parents to tell me what to do. I used to worry about them worrying about me. I realize now that I’m not in charge of their feelings. If they want to worry, it’s none of my business. I am sorry, self, that I have not cut the umbilical cord sooner. I love myself and I affirm that it is okay for me to have what I want, even though it is different from my parents. I forgive myself that […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that it was hard to trust others to do anything in my world to the level I would do it and that other people were at times the cause of my really big problems. That I didn’t reach my goal because someone screwed up or didn’t do what they said they would do or didn’t do it the way I would do it and I really relied on them.  I used to have this belief that I can’t achieve my […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   This script can be applied to both men and women. I used to believe that any man I loved would not be emotionally available to me and would be unreliable. My father was not a very good provider, and he often spent money on himself when his children were in need. He would also sit alone in his study, and he preferred his books and music to people. If I wanted his love and attention I had to go and get them. He was […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick I used to believe that other people can make me feel bad. I believed that because there was a time when I felt hurt by what someone else said. I realize now that we build fortresses around our weaknesses and I was protecting and guarding something that I believed about myself and that they pointed out. I realize now that anytime I am inclined to feel hurt by what someone else has said it is always me that is in agreement with what they said […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that I was a secondary character in my own life.  The sisters on either side of me were both very aggressive, and each one of them voiced her wishes and argued with Mom. They seemed to me to get their way more than I did, to get the clothes and things they wanted while I wore hand me downs.  And they seemed to get more attention. I interpreted all of this to mean that I was not as important, and […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that I am sick. I used to believe that my parents were right telling me that I will become sick and that I look sick. I used to believe that I can’t get healthy and that nothing will cure me. I used to believe that I am not worthy enough to get healthy. I used to believe when people were saying to me that I look pale and sick. I also used to believe that if I am sick people […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that all my parent’s fights and rows were because my Dad was not a good husband or father. I thought that because he drank, he did not love us. My mother hated booze because her own mother was an alcoholic.  My earliest memories were of knock-down and drag-out fights and arguments at any time of the day or night. My mother believed a good woman can change a man. I believed that all men were incapable of being faithful because […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that I was safe from being humiliated if I would let every distraction interfere with my choice to take empowered action. I realize now that the reason I believed that was because I bought into other people’s criticism of me and became afraid of my own power. I realize now that being afraid of other people’s criticism was me already not being in my power. So it was a really good thing that they criticized me so that I could […]

By Dr. Janeen J. Detrick   I used to believe that I was powerless to influence my own life. I believed that because my parents always told me to do something different than I wanted to do, I learned to believe that everything I wanted was bad for me. And I learned to mistrust my own internal guidance system. I know that my parents were only trying to help me and I completely love and accept them. But I know now that the only way I can grow is by […]