By Janeen J. Detrick
The study of the eight different types of intelligences reveals that there is one major difference between “Social Intelligence”, and “Emotional Intelligence”. Social intelligence is characterized by an ability to understand and manage relationships with other people. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and manage the relationship One has with ONESELF. Social intelligence is INTER-PERSONAL, and emotional intelligence in INTRA-PERSONAL. And you know what? A person can have one and not the other! A person can have excellent social skills, but not have a clue what is going on inside his intra-personal life! This article is designed to stimulate the pondering of what it means to be emotionally mature, so that we can each be in touch with the ONLY person we can change: Ourselves!
Emotional maturity is the ability to:
1. Take responsibility for our own emotions, especially the ones we do not like!
2. Diffuse our anger, not to yield quickly to emotions.
3. Remain in touch with our deepest desires, even when other feelings well up!
4. Identify and name our emotions. (fear, frustration, lonliness, disregarded, shyness, sadness, etc… Google a list of feeling words!)
5. Identify both our strengths and our weaknesses.
6. Motivate ourselves
7. Ability to persist in the face of challenges.
8. Ability to consider, in advance, potential consequences of our actions.
9. Ability to measure the appropriateness of our reactions in relation to the stimuli.
10. Ability to speak up for ourselves.
11. Ability to express our feelings, even when other people may find it hard to hear.
12. Ability to identify the cause of our feelings: What are we afraid of? Why do you think that is so bad?
13. Ability to differentiate between feelings and that on which we should take action.
14. Ability to use logic and analytical thinking in making discernments.
15. Ability to direct our emotions into constructive channels.
16. Ability to consider self and also other’s interests.
17. Ability to be patient for success and allow the divine order of things to come around to them in it’s own time.
Emotional maturity CAN be cultivated, and it’s worth it! Emotional maturity has been proven in case studies to be the number one indicator of a successful life!
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