When we get stuck in a trigger, I have learned that there are three questions we can ask ourselves that can unlock us from that trigger.
The first thing out of our mouths when we are talking with someone else, and then get triggered, in their presence, is to say, “I’m feeling triggered. I will look at what is causing me to get triggered. So, right now, I’m going to remove myself and go get some clarity.”
That way, we’re not blaming them, and projecting that there is somehow something wrong with THEM!
Then, in the quietness of your own space, ask yourself these questions:
- What am I afraid I won’t get, or could lose, because of what I think I see in that other person?
- What does trying to get something out of that person, and being afraid that I won’t, have to do with Being Love? This causes us to see that IT REALLY IS US! If we’re trying to get something out of someone else, is that loving them? Of course not!
- Last, but certainly not least, then ask yourself this question, so it opens you up to receiving a whole new perspective from Spirit; “What’s right about him (or her, or it, the situation) being that way, that I haven’t been comprehending before?
When we think someone or something “should change”, then we are in a state of resistance, which can only come from FEAR. What are you afraid of? When you identify your fear, you can then see how you attracted and created it being exactly THAT way, so that you can shift and clear that energy inside you!
It serves us!
I like this Byron Katie quote, “I am a lover of What IS. Not because I am a spiritual person, but because arguing with reality hurts.”
Other people get to be different than you! If you are making different choices than they are, you do get to respectfully part ways, but don’t do it because you don’t respect how they are creating their life differently from your own. Do it because if you can’t see that their way may be different, but it is not less (it’s only less FOR YOU!) then you will simply attract the exact same lesson with a different face or name on it! But you won’t escape the lesson; The energy inside you will draw the same junk to you until the energy inside you is different!
Respect yourself enough to stay in your power, and also let other people stay in theirs! Not choosing to be with them ins not a bad thing! It is simply a recognition that you are no longer vibrating the way they are.
That’s all! And nothing bad is happening! It doesn’t hurt to accept new ways of seeing things! It’s FREEING!
Dr. Janeen
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