Today’s call was a real joy to host. Several of the questions provided were founded in seeking clarification on how to effectively work with other people’s negativity.
It is fairly common for us to get triggered by other people’s negativity, especially when we have done so much work on managing it within ourselves. And while this is the case it is important to keep in mind that what we are observing in someone else is triggering something that already exists within us, something we judge.
I love the quote that says we will continue to get tested until we no longer get triggered. What this means is, as long as we hold charge/resistance within u, it will continue to bring situations/opportunities in our lives to give us a chance to release it. So when this charge shows up it can literally be perceived as a good thing. Its kind of like discovering a hole in your boat. Its really good to know if you have an energy leak, a place where you are losing power habitually. Now if we resist the charge within or the situation that triggers it this doesn’t help and we will continue to attract more tests in our future. Its like pushing down the emotion and saying come back later and feel free to bring your friends next time. Remember whatever you resist you are feeding energy to it.
So looking at the charge first inside our self is really important. The solution to end the suffering and sabotage is provided in the 3 step clearing that I put together from some of my most significant influences. Namely Eckhart Tolle, The Heartmath Institute, David Hawkins, and Dr Hu Len’s Ho’oponopono.
Here it is:
The End All Be All 3 Step Clearing – From Gil McIff
Feeding what you want is natural and easy, you are already doing this in many ways. The emphasis of this practice is focused on starving what you don’t want by simply observing the emotional characteristics and thereby disidentifying from them. Your habitual state of consciousness is the number one determinant of your personal experiences and your future.
Check in 10+ times a day with the Question “How do I feel right now?”
You can use a reminder app on your phone, an alarm on your phone, sticky notes placed in random places, paint one fingernail different from the rest, wear your watch on the opposite arm, or put a bandage on your finger. Every time this catches your attention ask yourself, “Emotionally how do I feel right in my body right now?”
If you are feeling what you would like to be feeling then start with step 2.
If there is ANY kind of negativity or it is simply a lower emotional state than what you would chose, it’s a habitual unconscious reaction to what you are perceiving, based on conditioned interpretation and is simply an old program running; and it’s time to do the following 3 steps:
- Say These Specific Words – There it is, thats not me, thats a program.
- Observe it deeply – What sensations do I feel? Where do I feel them? Or simply I feel it (here), it feels like (this). Realize who is doing this inquiring? Its You!
- Thank You for checking in, I love you I love you I love you- Thank you for no longer feeding the program, Thank you for dis-identifying from the program, thank you for catching yourself and no longer losing energy here. Thank you for whatever you want to say thank you for. I love you, I love you, I love you!
There it is. That’s not me. That’s a program.
I feel it (location), it feels like (characteristics).
Thank You, I love you I love you I love you
These steps are not for the purpose of getting rid of the negative feeling, ie resisting and therefore feeding what we don’t want. That benefit may sometimes come, but this practice is more about implementing a new habit/program. So every time you observe the emotion it is an opportunity to observe without judgment. It doesn’t matter what emotion is there, what matters is that you simply observe it without giving it any meaning. When this becomes habit you will have successfully reprogrammed the unconscious perpetuation of the old reaction with the automatic newly programmed conscious response.
It takes less than 30 seconds to do this practice. 30 seconds at 10x a day = 5 minutes
How many days will it take before this healthy response has become a new program for you?
This clearing method is designed to become habitual very quickly. In fact anything you do ten times a day should become a habit really quickly. The beauty of this practice is that it is too easy for the ego to find a good reason not to do it. Usually the ego reasons are really lame things like, “I don’t have the time” or “5 times is enough I’m sure” or “Its not working anyway” or “I know how to change it to make it better”. All of these sabotaging reasons to not do this practice exactly how its outlined are weak in comparison to the deliverable.
In order to make it even harder for the ego to sabotage this practice I advised that one should invest 45 minutes with a pen on paper writing out what your life would be like if there was no longer any negativity, suffering or sabotage. To write this in an effective way one should literally pretend that this is reality and essentially journal a day in the life of it. Remember the negativity doesn’t exist so the writing will not include any mention of it. It will all be acting as if its real. Joe Vitale calls this Nevillizing. The metaphysical community calls it creative visualization. NLP calls it Acting As If. Children call it pretending.
It really doesn’t matter what you call it. But if you write this out in a holistic way it will encompass at least all the primary aspects of your life. Health, Finances, Relationships etc. When you have this complete you will then have a fairly clear vision of WHY you are doing the 3 step clearing and a strong antidote to any egoic resistance that shows up.
Now once this practice becomes habitual, it can then be modified. For example, there it is that’s a program that’s not Him/Her. We begin to see the habitual conditioned programming in others as separate from their authentic identity. When we actually see someone else for who they really are and not what they project, then we give them a much needed break from their conditioned identity and whether they realize it or not, They Feel It. When they feel it consistently the automatically begin to change. Its like a miracle. Try it, but first make it a habit for yourself. Do it, Feel it, Share it.
Thank You to everyone who was present and to everyone reading this.
-Namaste
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